Good morning friends!
Today’s post was originally just a question on Instagram Stories but I received so many great resources and more importantly so many messages from parents in the same boat I wanted to share everything more thoroughly here.
If you missed it, I had asked for recommendations on how to better communicate with Zain. He’s entered a phase where it’s hard for him to focus and listen and if he does hear what I say, he often ignores what I’m requesting. I’ve tried a few of the things that were recommended and I do think they seem to work I just need to continue to be consistent and not lose my cool 😉 Patience is not my strong suit and I am also trying to approach my children with a bit more understanding than the old school parenting style I’m used to but sometimes it’s tough.
I ordered How To Talk so Little Kids Will Listen because it was recommended so many times and will definitely report back on my thoughts! They also have an app that many said was worth every penny. If you have any other suggestions feel free to leave them in the comment section so everyone can benefit. Thank you all again for being such an amazing resource and all the encouragement! I am sending each of your some love and solitude because we are all in the same boat and it’s a true learning experience.
True consequences: set boundaries and follow through!
@drbeckyatgoodinside – great tips on her Instagram and podcast!
1,2,3 Magic – parent & kid version
Have them repeat request back to you
Pause after direction given – many messages about their auditory system not being developed so to keep directions short and simple and pause after to allow them to repeat directions back to you
@biglittlefeelings – so many suggestions to follow their instagram and several said they bought their course and benefitted
Countdown to timeout – We usually do 3,2,1
Set a timer – I’ve started doing this for a lot of things and it seems to work really well but haven’t tried it for following directions. More so like ‘you can have 2 more minutes to play’ but am going to try it out!
Statements instead of Do/Don’t – need to do this!
Get on their level and use eye contact – I usually say ‘eyes’ so he will focus and look at me and it generally works. They are so busy!
Give 2 choices so he is making a choice – for example, listen or this activity will be taken away
Simplify requests – need to work on this as well!
‘Be a first time listener’ – this came in several times from daycare workers and teachers. Remind your children to be first time listeners and they may take pride in it!
Close your eyes trick – I had never heard of this but many say it works. Have them close their eyes and repeat what you asked so they focus.
Keep speech short and tell them what TO DO vs what NOT to do – great advice and have recently been doing this and it’s helped!
‘I can see you a having a hard time listening’
Make it playful – song, game, etc
Hope this is helpful and have a wonderful day friends!